Praise the Lard?

My name is Charlie, and I'm a compulsive overeater.

::Hi, Charlie!::

Really interesting article on MSNBC's "Diet & Nutrition" website today.

I was on an OA retreat this past weekend. It was a wonderful time, and I hope to write about it later this week. Anyway, one of the new women who showed up is a very devout Southern Baptist lady, and I was struck by one of her statements. She talked about how the church is full of nice, fat church ladies... and no one ever addresses it. It's certainly been my experience in church. We make our little jokes about how "these cookies don't have calories" (ha ha) or say, "Oh, I really shouldn't," while we take one (or two), and everyone just pretends we're not slowly killing ourselves.

Maybe it's like this everywhere. Maybe it's just human nature, especially in the 21st century in America, but I do notice it everywhere I look in the church.

I had a cool experience this morning. As I was greeting people after the service, I was approached by a young woman who exclaimed, "You're so skinny!" I am used to hearing that these days, and I just smile and say, "Well, thanks..." But she was different. I could see pain in her eyes as she asked me how I had done it. She was really hungry for answers. I could tell she could handle the truth, and I let her know I'm working a 12 Step program for food addiction and compulsive overeating. I told her that I'm insane when it comes to food, and I desperately need a program to relieve me of this disease. She was instantly interested and told me she knows this is true about her too. She wants to talk to me later this week, and I'm certainly willing to share my experience, strength and hope with her. I pray that - if she truly is a compulsive overeater - she will have the willingness to seek me out (or find any other way!) to explore Overeaters Anonymous.

What do you think? Are religion and obesity linked? Why or why not?

Medical Coding Certification Dot Com?

Hi, I'm Charlie, a compulsive overeater.

::Hi, Charlie!::

Not sure what this site is all about, but I'm listed there, and it's bringing traffic to my blog, so I'm grateful! Check it out:

50 Best Blogs for Beating Food Addiction

Living the Message = Carrying the Message

My name is Charlie, and I'm a compulsive overeater.

::Hi, Charlie!::

Today I want to talk about what the 12th Step talks about: "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to [compulsive overeaters], and to practice these principles in all our affairs." I've been thinking about this a lot since Friday night. I was at a concert, and I saw a very obese woman. She was one of the largest people I've ever seen out in public, and it looked like everything she did was difficult. I felt just awful for her, and I wondered what my obligation was/is to help people who are still suffering from the ravages of this disease.

It was still on my mind the next day, so I talked to a friend in OA with 3+ years of abstinence and amazing physical recovery. She had some great things to say, and I started to feel some peace.

Then, amazingly, this was my reading and question on Sunday:

Read Chapter 11 (BB). Discuss and reflect upon the vision God has for you. Discuss at length what this concept means to you: "The answers will come if our own house is in order."

My writing:

I love this chapter, because so much of it is about carrying the message to other people. I have been thinking about the incredible epidemic of compulsive eating all around me. I know I can’t diagnose other people’s illness, but I also know that our disease is under-diagnosed. I have been a compulsive overeater for years and didn’t know it until 2006. I’ve been thinking about this since Friday night. I was at a concert, and I saw a very obese woman in the back row. My heart just broke for her, because I could tell how difficult it was for her to even be there. At least physically. I was happy that she could still get out and about, but I wondered how to carry the message of Overeaters Anonymous to her! In A Vision for You, we read about Bill W. and Doctor Bob and how they carried the message to other desperate alcoholics. There are, of course, corresponding principles. That’s why I’m reading the Big Book! But I don’t know how to reach out to that woman… You can’t just walk up to someone and say, “You look like you could use Overeaters Anonymous,” unless you want to hurt and embarrass someone!

I talked about this with a wise Program friend yesterday, and her thoughts made sense to me. We carry the message by living it. By working the best Program that we can. By surrendering to God, by growing in our conscious contact with God, by releasing excess weight to God (in God’s time), by making calls and going to meetings and doing service… And being ready to share the message when people are ready to hear it, and when we are asked. If we are living the Program, our lives will show it. We will have what people want and when they ask us how we got it, we’ll be ready to tell them.

When the book says, “the answers will come if our own house is in order,” it is in the context of asking God every day what we can do for the person who still suffers. And the answer is just what I’ve been writing about: living a good Program, surrendering to God on a daily basis, working the steps, staying abstinent. Living the message leads to carrying the message.

The amazing coincidence (although I don’t believe it’s coincidence) is that even as I type this, I am getting direct messages on Twitter from a person who discovered my anonymous OA blog…  pouring out her heart about... At this very moment… I am living out the message. And now I have this beautiful opportunity to carry the message, to point someone toward the solution. I am so grateful. Here I go!

 

I ended up talking with that person on the phone and carrying the message that afternoon. Then I was able to do an interview with AllTreatment.com. Then I talked with an old program friend the next evening and hooked her up with a sponsor.

I'm so grateful for a weekend of encountering God, living the message and carrying the message.

With Gratitude

Hi. My name is Charlie, and I'm a compulsive overeater.

::Hi, Charlie!::

I have been reflecting on my two months of abstinence in the Overeaters Anonymous H.O.W. program. I have so much gratitude for where I am today. 

On August 2, I wrote this post. It was basically moaning and whining and complaining. I was so angry, so resentful. I was a victim. I was hopeless and helpless.

A couple of days later, my blogger friend G. Rabanon (@RecoveringinOA on Twitter) reached out to me via email. I've asked her if I can share her email, because it was a life-changer for me. God used it, along with a phone call from the woman who is now my sponsor, to get me back to an O.A. meeting where I found a sponsor - that very day - and surrendered to this structured plan of recovery.

Here's G.'s [slightly abridged] email:

"Hi!

Looks like you've got a serious case of the "fuck it"s. It's ok, it happens to all of us. I understand losing your willingness. It's a horrible feeling...

You made the distinction, Charlie, between a slip and a relapse. Well, let me tell you, there is no difference. Know why? Because all any of us has is Today, This Moment, Right Now. There's no such thing as relapse, there is just "Are you slipping now? How about now? What about now? Did you slip now? You gonna slip now?" Every moment that you don't slip, you are abstinent. When you slip, you lose that abstinence. You need to make a decision, Charlie. From this moment (if you are eating something not abstinent right now, stop. Just stop. Now. Just for this moment STOP!) you are abstinent. You are abstinent RIGHT NOW as you are reading this. The decision you have to make RIGHT NOW Charlie, is to NOT LOSE YOUR ABSTINENCE RIGHT NOW. Just for this moment. And now the moment has passed. And now in this moment, DO NOT LOSE YOUR ABSTINENCE! Just for this moment... and now the moment has passed. That is all you have to do Charlie. And it is so hard not to string the time together and lose track and lose sight of each individual minute, but that is what we have to do. We who suffer from the disease of addiction have to remember moments like other "normal" people can get away with ignoring. Sometimes it really really sucks. But you know... I think overall it's a blessing. How many Normals routinely make the effort to experience every minute of their lives and to be grateful for it? Our lives depend on it. In that sense, we are the lucky ones.

I'm with you Charlie, and so is God. God loves you even when you forget to take His hand. He's still reaching out to you. And when you have one hand in mine and one hand in God's, you have no free hands to pick up.

I wish you an abstinent weekend and look forward to hearing from you. :)

-g" 

Today I celebrate the 12th Step - "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to other compulsive overeaters, and to practice these principles in all our affairs" - with great gratitude to G. and to my sponsor. And to anyone else who carries the message by reading or commenting here on my blog, calling or emailing me, or sharing in O.A. meetings. You all are awesome, and I am so grateful for you.