Monday, January 23, 2012

What Now?

My name is Charlie, and I'm a compulsive overeater.

::Hi, Charlie!::

Even now, after sitting here in the kitchen and eating and eating and eating. Even now, I am in denial. I don't have a problem. I just need to be more careful. I just need to do better. Maybe I should start a new diet tomorrow. Maybe I could count calories or do Weight Watchers.

God, help me. I'm getting up early tomorrow. I have to start doing the things I did when I was abstinent before. That's how it worked for me, right? Why so stubborn?

16 comments:

zannelaw said...

Actually, I keep hearing about how great Weight Watchers is and how it really does help people.

And Charlie, have you ever considered that the problem is brain chemistry? I went on Celexa 2 weeks ago for my SAD which makes me eat like a madwoman and I'm a changed person! It can still be a struggle a little but I have so much more control now! I'm a believer!

Melissa said...

I read you blog awhile ago when I was sure I had an addiction to food and was so lost. I tried OA. I couldn't handle OA and living my life jumping through such hoops and not being able to live a normal life. I just wanted to be normal. I know you have read a million books. Please read "Brain Over Binge." It was the only thing that actually made sense. OA is awesome and might work for some people or for sometime. It wasn't what I needed. In the end maybe that is what you need, but figured it was worth it to throw this out there.

one recovered compulsive overeater said...

Praying for your sanity.

zannelaw said...

Charlie where are you?

Anonymous said...

Melissa,

I checked out that book - it was my story and made total sense.

I can't thank you enough. I came back to this site to thank you,

Jay

Anonymous said...

hoping you are well. your blog has helped me.thanks for writing. come back.

memoirs of this binge eating triathlete said...

I'm sending pyayers your way Charlie. We'll struggle together, and heal together too. God bless you my friend.

Above everything, we alcoholics must be rid of this selfishness. We must, or it kills us! (Alcoholics Anonymous, page 62)

It is important for him to realize that your attempt to pass this on to him plays a vital part in your own recovery. Actually, he may be helping you more than you are helping him. (Alcoholics Anonymous, page 94)

sheryl said...

Hi, Charlie. Just reading this post now. Hope this comment finds you doing better. Please don't give-up on OA - after many years in and out, I finally "got it" and you can, too! Please check out my blog at diaryofafoodfighter.com (only showing-up on Google - I have no idea why.) There is so much hope and help in the halls! God bless!

Jon Becker said...

Hey, Charlie! I just found your blog this morning, and I want to encourage you to come back and post again. I have been in OA for four years and I understand how hard it is. Jesus Christ is also my higher power, and I have to remind myself daily that He doesn't need MY help. If I don't do this, then I try to take back control. Hang in there brother...

Marie said...

I am a CEA HOW member on Day 2 of abstinence. I understand the peace that comes with a solid program and a weighed, measured and reported food plan. I hope you can get back on track. If you know program is for you, then you also know WW or another diet won't work - don't waste your money! Hope you find what you are looking for.

Charlie O. Edinburgh said...

I am so grateful for all of you. Thanks for not giving up on me. Today is my Day 2 of (almost) OA-HOW abstinence. I'm weighing and measuring my food, doing daily reading/writing and checking in with my sponsor daily on the phone. The relief is so sweet. Really... I feel a lot of love and gratitude toward you all.

Tarquin said...

Hi Charlie
I have checked your blog everyday for months as my way of keeping faith that you would find your way back to the sanity that you were experiencing last year. Good on you Charlie!

Charlie O. Edinburgh said...

Thank you, Tarquin! I'm really touched by that...

stop overeating said...

I understand your problems, God blessing to you, Thanks

compulsive eating said...

Really thanks for this blog post.

compulsive eating said...

Really thanks for this blog post.