Recovering from compulsive overeating one day at a time.
Hi, my name is Kim and I'm a compulsive overeater. It took me a very long time to say that---But it's true.I just started OA two weeks ago and am feeling a bit overwhelmed and yet I also feel relief knowing that there are others like me, who understand me-- and they understand you too. Keep Going Back. One Day At A Time. Use the Tools. Work the Steps. One Day At A Time.Thanks for letting me share.
::hi charlie::seems like perhaps a little perfectionism has got the best of you these days ... i often struggle with the all or nothing ... the "if i can't do it perfectly right, then i'm going to do it perfectly wrong!"my experience has been that when you lose your abstinence, it seems like you can never really get it back get, exactly as you had it before. perhaps that is because the disease has evolved, so what worked before doesn't work again? or perhaps what you had before wasn't "right" to begin with, or better said, it was right at the time, for what you needed then, but needs change. regardless, sometimes you just have to pick yourself up and start small. sometimes you have to be o.k. with significantly less than what you think you should be capable of.i think the disease clouds our minds as to what is and should be required of ourselves. a good filter for me to use in this arena is this - if a sponsee called me and said "this is what i've been doing, this is what i ate, this what my struggle is right now," would i tell them, "well, you screwed up again, you blew it, you just can't get it right" ... or would I say "be gentle on yourself, be kind, call off the dogs and give yourself a chance to breathe" ... far more often than not, i find that what i tell myself and what i would tell a sponsee are night and day different, generally indicating that i am being far too hard on myself.that of course doesn't inevitably make it go away, but at least it sheds a little reality-light on it.i've always started "abstience" with something that i (or a sponsee) can be successful at - never swearing off everything else at once. some people might call it "giving god a chance to work some miracles", some people might call it "starting off slowly and giving yourself time to catch up", and some people might call it "getting the disease to shut up just enough to let your higher power have a voice".however you want to look at it, i hope that you ease up on that charlie person ... you're doing the best you can right now with what you've got, and when you can do better, you'll do better! just for today, ask god to help you to be willing - to help you to be willing to be willing - to help you to be kind and loving to charlie.
Wow. I needed to hear that.
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