Friday, November 12, 2010

Experience, Strength and Hope

Hi, my name is Charlie, and I'm a compulsive overeater.

::Hi, Charlie!::

I can't believe it's been a week since I last posted here. I haven't gone anywhere. I'm still abstinent, by the grace of God. It's just been busy. So much happening all the time. With Christmas coming, this music minister's time is often spent prepping for cantatas and Christmas Eve services. And, of course, I'm always busy calling OA friends, planning meals, packing lunches, reading OA literature, writing (just started my actual 4th Step inventory this morning!), talking to my sponsor every day, Tweeting... Oh yeah, and trying to be a halfway decent dad and husband.

And you know what? I think I'm becoming a better dad and husband, a better pastor and friend. I think this program is working. I know my wife is happy with the changes in my life. She has commented that she likes this "new me" that is emerging. I have never felt so disciplined. I have never been able to stick with anything for any length of time before now. I am so grateful.

Last Saturday my sponsor and I met to do a "Step Up" ceremony. We spent two hours together, talking and reading and even lighting candles. I loved it. I formally became a sponsor in the OA-HOW program. It was powerful. Sometime I'd like to write about that experience. Did I mention there were candles?

And tonight I will "Step Up" on the phone meeting. I will be doing the ceremony and then sharing my experience, strength and hope. I'm a little nervous. But I think it's the right thing to do. I was startled when the meeting leader asked me to do it - only this morning - but after talking to my sponsor, praying about it, and asking friends on the phone and on Twitter, I've decided to go ahead and do it. God will guide me. I will say what I'm supposed to say.

So, my prayer tonight:

God, I offer myself to Thee
To build with me and to do with me as Thou wilt.
Relieve me of the bondage of self, that I may better do Thy will.
Take away my difficulties, that victory over them may bear witness
To Thy power, Thy love and Thy way of life.
May I do Thy will always.


Beth @ To the Fullest said...

I didn't know that you're a pastor. You're growing more awesome in my perception by the minute! (Er, well, maybe by the blog know what I mean!). Congrats on your many victories.

Sabilon said...

I am really inspired! Would love to know what the 'new you' is like. Don't know your old you, neither. Sounds exciting.

Anonymous said...

What a fantastic witness- what's that Pastors are real people too?

I am embarking on my own journey to recovery and I am inspired by what I have read. Will be starting my own journal too soon!

104 days- truly inspirational